Intimate relationships start with good questions which lead to good conversations. Here are just two questions that are guaranteed to help you experience a deeper connection. By the way, these questions are powerful to ask any person you meet for the first time. If you sincerely ask these two questions from the heart with a REAL interest in the answer, you will definitely leave a positive impression on anyone. And we all know how important first impressions are right?
These days in a world full of superficial distractions we have to be very careful not to lose the art of creating deeper human connections through simple, open, honest communication.Just because you know how to talk that doesn’t mean you know how to communicate, there’s a HUGE a difference.
One of the things i love to do when amongst a group of people who are chatting away, is just sit back observe and listen to them communicate with one another. It surprises me how I often I hear people exchanging alternating monologues rather than having an actual dialog. This is a type of communication where two people are simply exchanging words about themselves in the hope that the more they talk about themselves the more likely it is that the other person will like them. It’s a type of self-absorption in the moment rather than actually tapping into the heart and soul of the other person in order to connect.
Asking quality questions with a sincere interest in listening to the answer is key and here are two simple questions for you to ask anyone when you meet them for the first time:
- ‘So, what’s your thing?’ and
- ‘Why is that important to you?’
Rather than asking the plain old vanilla ice-cream question of ‘what do you do’ and then pretending to be interested in the answer, a MUCH more interesting and meaningful question is ask what their THING is and here’s why.
“Just because you know how to talk that doesn’t mean you know how to communicate, there’s a HUGE a difference.”
Unless you are making a living from a job that absolutely 100% makes your heart sing and inspires you, you’re unlikely to be doing ‘your thing’. Instead, you’re just working in a job to earn money to pay bills and survive. And of course, that’s totally cool and necessary for many of us. If you REALLY want to get to know someone, ask them what their thing is. The ‘thing’, being what really excites and inspires them. This could be playing a musical instrument, doing volunteer work, entertaining kids, extreme sports, sail boating, world travel, painting, bush walking, ancient civilizations, metaphysical phenomena etc. This is what I mean by your THING.
Once you have that persons ‘thing’, the next question is totally obvious right.
‘Why is that important to you?’
Once they’ve told you WHAT makes their heart sing, the next powerful thing to ask them to connect with and share is WHY that ‘thing’ makes their heart sing. All you have to do from there is just . .
LISTEN WITH GENUINE INTEREST!
Even if their thing isn’t your thing, just honor the fact that it excites THEM. If you like people then just the fact that it excites them should excite you. These two questions are guaranteed to help you find not only your life partner, but your true love when you ask the kinds of questions that allows the other person to open up to you.
So just try this next time you meet someone for the first time who catches your eye and your heart and just see what happens.